They say the eyes are the windows to the soul, and sure they are. Whenever we converse with people, our eyes say a lot about what we are thinking, or feeling at that time.
Interestingly, it is with our eyes that we make most judgements about people when we talk to them, yet it is the very same eyes that betray our feelings and judgements. Although there are many conventional explanations to eyes body language, most of the time people understand your behavior intuitively, often even sub-consciously. But there is still a need to know some of these conventions.
Have you ever known why, for example, clubs and romantic restaurants are usually dimly lit? The truth is that this has a lot to do with the eyes.
Pupil Dilation
The pupil is the one part of the eye that you just have no control over. When you are excited, the pupil dilates, automatically. This is the same thing that happens when women are attracted to men, and vice versa.
On the other hand, when one is angry for some reason, the pupil contracts. This is also automatic and we have no control over the behavior of the pupil in this manner. Well, at least not consciously.
When you look into someone's eyes, it is easy to notice whether they are excited or irritated. Perhaps the famous romantic act of “staring into each others eyes” lends credence to this thought. People who are attracted to each other are famously known to do the “staring into each other's eyes”. But unknown to them, what they are doing is looking for the sign of the dilating pupil.
Pupils will also dilate if one is in a dark, or dimly lit environment. The feelings or the attitude of a person at this time has no bearing on this dilation of the pupils. Yet to another person, you will appear to be excited or aroused just because your pupils are larger. This, basically, is the idea behind dimly lit restaurants and clubs, and it works quite well.
You may may want to call it manipulation, or deception considering that everyone will look happy and excited, when in fact they may not be, but that really depends on your perspective of things. The truth is that since the beginning of time, dim lighting has been known to be the perfect setting for romantic restaurants.
So look at the woman above, in which picture do you find more attractive?
(I'm willing to bet it's in picture #2 –> where her pupils are dilated)
What Your Eyebrows Tell Us
It's not the pupils alone that are expressive of a person's feelings. Eyebrows also tell a lot about you when communicating. When both eyebrows are raised, for example, it is an indication of friendliness, sometimes associated with submissiveness, especially in women.
Many celebrity photos, or the female models on the magazine covers, are taken with the eyebrows raised. Since these photos are usually appealing to men, perhaps we can say that raised eyebrows are romantic too. Well, if you want to send your boyfriend a photo of you, you may well consider raising your eyebrows a little. In fact, chances are that you already do this all the time, unconsciously.
Raised eyebrows and lowered eyelids make a perfect combination. Lowering the eyelids shows a lot of submissiveness, sometimes what is referred to as suggestiveness. People who do this are usually considered extremely sexy by members of the opposite sex, although it is actually because they seem to look like easier prey, even loose.
Lowered eyebrows indicate the exact opposite. They give the look of authority, aggressiveness and dominance. This is usually associated with the strict boss at work demanding and reprimanding his staff. Closer to home, consider a parent punishing their child. They will almost certainly have lowered eyebrows.
One cannot help but mention that although eyes body language skills are very important, it is easy to be misled.
For a more accurate understanding of communication, perhaps it is important to understand all elements of communication because you will have to analyse a number of gestures in order to make a sound judgement. It is also important to capture the context of communication, both physical and otherwise. Some behaviors mean different things in different contexts, and it is easy to misunderstand a person.
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